That's from Godey's Ladies' Book, and it epitomizes what the Cult of Domesticity stood for, or rather stands for. It emerged in the 19th century, the era most prolific in anti-sex literature, and sexism to this day has developed into a subtler form, which is infuriatingly harder to prove. However, the blatant sexist views of the 19th century still linger today, mainly in the fundamentalist conservative Christian society, located largely in the bible belt of America. The fundamentalist conservative Christian society could aptly be described as a subculture, and to clarify this is the extreme side of Christian society. The Christians in this subculture not only advocate the immorality of sex before marriage and abortion, but go as far to insist that birth control is ungodly, that women must only wear skirts and dresses, that kids should not be subjected to the evils of public school, that wine is a source of evil, and that all types of kissing before marriage constitutes as inappropriate premarital relations. In today's culture a prime example would be the Duggar family on TLC's show "19 Kids and Counting". The 19 kids are evidence of the lack of birth control, all the girls are only allowed to wear skirts, all children are home schooled, and the kids do not date but rather engage in courtship. These are only a few characteristics of the fundamental biblical subculture.
It is in this strait-laced conservative society that the Cult of Domesticity thrives. The Cult of Domesticity advocates the four ideal virtues of "true womanhood": piety, purity, submission, and domesticity. The Cult of Domesticity insists that the woman's place, and only place in life, is in the home with her children and husband. Girls are born with a career plan already decided for them, and that's in the home as wife, mother, and homemaker.
We're living in the 21st century, so the fact that this narrow mindset still exists after two hundred years is a bit disconcerting. Today's fundamental Christian movement on "femininity", as they call it, mirrors so closely the same Cult of Domesticity that purported the degrading Scientific Sexism for women.
Godey's Ladies' Book is flooded with charming little drawings of the demure, angelic-looking wife with her husband and children. The many online blogs of women in the femininity movement feature pictures with similar subjects; the same virginal-looking women but trapped behind the paintbrush strokes of John Waterhouse and other dreamy, tranquil water paintings. The categories for the blog posts are all the same for each. "Modesty", "Femininity", "Homemaking", "Home Education", "Courtship", and "Loving our Husbands" are usually where the most prolific writing occurs. Modesty and femininity are both defined as only wearing skirts, for God forbid they wear pants and become "more masculine". Homemaking covers everything from being thrifty to sewing, to keeping a clean house and a well-stocked pantry. Home Education values the god-given task of mothers to train their children not only standard curricula but for girls the domestic skills needed for their future. Courtship is the Cult of Domesticity's alternative to dating. In Courtship, there is always a chaperone; there is no kissing before marriage; the boy must ask permission to marry the girl; and the girl is expected to dress modestly because the boy will be unable to control his lustful faults. Loving our Husbands purports that the wife is to submit wholeheartedly to her husband. To quote a young man eager about finding his future wife, "I believe in exchanging tasks so that the woman gets into the pattern of getting outside her own needs and thinking about her obligations to me."
The Four Ideals of "True Womanhood"
Piety: The Cult of Domesticity places a sense that women have a propensity to spirituality, and that men are in need of a strong Christian woman to support him.
It is in this strait-laced conservative society that the Cult of Domesticity thrives. The Cult of Domesticity advocates the four ideal virtues of "true womanhood": piety, purity, submission, and domesticity. The Cult of Domesticity insists that the woman's place, and only place in life, is in the home with her children and husband. Girls are born with a career plan already decided for them, and that's in the home as wife, mother, and homemaker.
We're living in the 21st century, so the fact that this narrow mindset still exists after two hundred years is a bit disconcerting. Today's fundamental Christian movement on "femininity", as they call it, mirrors so closely the same Cult of Domesticity that purported the degrading Scientific Sexism for women.
Godey's Ladies' Book is flooded with charming little drawings of the demure, angelic-looking wife with her husband and children. The many online blogs of women in the femininity movement feature pictures with similar subjects; the same virginal-looking women but trapped behind the paintbrush strokes of John Waterhouse and other dreamy, tranquil water paintings. The categories for the blog posts are all the same for each. "Modesty", "Femininity", "Homemaking", "Home Education", "Courtship", and "Loving our Husbands" are usually where the most prolific writing occurs. Modesty and femininity are both defined as only wearing skirts, for God forbid they wear pants and become "more masculine". Homemaking covers everything from being thrifty to sewing, to keeping a clean house and a well-stocked pantry. Home Education values the god-given task of mothers to train their children not only standard curricula but for girls the domestic skills needed for their future. Courtship is the Cult of Domesticity's alternative to dating. In Courtship, there is always a chaperone; there is no kissing before marriage; the boy must ask permission to marry the girl; and the girl is expected to dress modestly because the boy will be unable to control his lustful faults. Loving our Husbands purports that the wife is to submit wholeheartedly to her husband. To quote a young man eager about finding his future wife, "I believe in exchanging tasks so that the woman gets into the pattern of getting outside her own needs and thinking about her obligations to me."
The Four Ideals of "True Womanhood"
Piety: The Cult of Domesticity places a sense that women have a propensity to spirituality, and that men are in need of a strong Christian woman to support him.
"We are daughters of the King! We are building a kingdom that will have no end. We are shaping cultures--for good or ill--as we go about our daily tasks. Let us purpose to follow Christ wholeheartedly, embracing the servanthood He demonstrated to us."
Purity: Virginity is treasured, and even after the wedding night, she is given the duty to retain purity. Men are ravenous beasts who cave to their sexual desires, but women are pure, and use their sexual power to ennoble men. She must dress modestly (and by modestly, they mean calf-length skirts and turtlenecks), because any lustful thought that enters a man's head upon sight of her puts her at fault.
"Truth number two: women hold the key. In the fallen scheme of things, men want sex more than women. And men are willing to modify their behaviour to get it (just Google to find some of the times Lysistrata’s challenge has worked to effect change in the real world as it did in Kenya in 2009). Men, even some Christian ones, aren’t going to act chastely towards their intended or the other women in their circle of influence if it isn’t required of them. You probably wouldn’t be able to stay on a diet if you worked in a bakery, either – constant temptation will have its effect and it women don’t expect men to behave like Christian gentleman, the men are less likely to do so." [Burnett, I sure as hell hope you read this! Talk about a flash back to AP English!]
Submission: According to the conservative Christian subculture, a woman is to submit to her husband, and that's that.
"God made men to lead, it comes natural for them. Women are natural followers. For a woman to try to lead men is improper, because she is taking on the disposition of a man. Feminists strongly resent a husband's Biblical right to rule over his wife with authority, and resent such women as well. Sadly, many working women today have lost sight of what it means to be a mother and a homemaker."
"A Christian wife sets her mind upon God and the Bible. She realizes that obeying her husband is absolutely essential if she is to please God. She understands that she is not a slave; but rather is the "weaker vessel" according to the Bible. She does not feel inferior because she knows that her husband's happiness and success are greatly influenced by her. She is the roses in the garden, the brightness in his life. A man without his wife is sad, lonely and unfulfilled."
Domesticity: In the Cult of Domesticity, the women has one career path and that is one of mother, wife, and homemaker. The task of running home is a glorified, as long as it's a woman completing it. For a man to do so is considered ungodly.
"Young women especially need to know there is something else of greater importance than college and career, and that they play a vital role in making a stable family. In order to have strong marriages, respectful children, and good churches, women need to return to the home."
"The woman who makes a sweet, beautiful home, filling it with love and prayer and purity, is doing something bitter than anything else her hands could find to do beneath the skies. A true mother is one of the holiest secrets of home happiness. God sends many beautiful things to this world, many noble gifts; but no blessing is richer than that which He bestows in a mother who has learned love's lessons well, and has realized something of the meaning of her sacred calling."
Antifeminism in the Cult of Domesticity
Hoping to protect what they call the god-ordained ideal of family, that is man being the bread maker and women the homemaker, the Cult of Domesticity attacks the radical views of feminism. Unfortunately, they truly seem to misunderstand feminism. The Cult of Domesticity has chosen to believe that feminism is the woman's desire to completely leave the family for a career, to have the ability to behave as sluts with the excuse that it is "liberation", and to become more masculine. Clearly there has been severe distortion of what feminism constitutes. Feminism is the ability a woman has to choose her own path, whether that is a career in the home or the work force; a woman has the right to lead a self-fulfilling life according to her own God-given individuality. Feminism does not advocate for women to become more like men, rather it preaches that femininity is strong, equally strong to masculinity. Feminism does not advocate "slutty" behavior, rather it wants to see women to not be dehumanized as sexual objects. Women are beyond sexual power, they have more to them than just sex and their baby-making abilities. Unfortunately, the Cult of Domesticity seems to purport women's sexuality as their only power, as proven by the above quote concerning Lysistrata. Lysistrata was a mythical woman of an ancient Greek play who convinced the women of two warring cities to withhold sex from their husbands in order to coerce them to come to peace. This sadly illustrates how women are dehumanized to sex objects. The Cult of Domesticity continually purports that it is the woman who causes the man's lustful downfall and in marriage gives women the responsibility to control men's lustful urges with the withdrawal of sex. Women are so much more than sex. Women have the capabilities to pursue other options other than only a homemaker, if they so choose.
"Women are more easily deceived, so we must be on our guard. The first woman targeted in the Bible was Eve and that is still happening today."
"Male headship in the family has been replaced by an "egalitarian" arrangement where the husband and wife "share" in the leadership responsibilities of the family. The scriptural idea that the man is head of the family (1 Cor. 11:3-12; Eph. 5:22-23) and lord of his household (1 Pet. 3:5-6) is considered by feminists to be both tyrannical and barbaric, a vestige of primitive man and his ability to physically dominate his spouse. In our day, the overwhelming majority of both men and women scoff at the notion that the wife should submit to her husband's authority."
"[In regards to feminism] ...Fueling discontent and pushing women out of their home in search of greater meaning and satisfaction has resulted in off-the-chart stress levels for many women who can no longer survive without pills and therapists. The woman who life does not center around her home and the well-being of her family and who is constantly darting form one place sand one activity to another is more vulnerable to being entailed in immoral relationships and is more likely to entice men who are vulnerable themselves. The greatest spiritual, moral, and emotional protection a woman will ever experience is found when she is content to stay within her God-appointed sphere."
"I think the key here is to look at what feminism has actually done. Has it promoted the overall happiness of women, stabilized the social structure of families, created a healthier (both physically and mentally) generation of children, contributed to economy, reduced the levels of stress and anxiety for both men and women? No, no and again, no. Feminism robbed countless women of the fulfillment they could easily and naturally have had as wives and mothers, leading them to the false belief they must do something “greater” to be happy, and causing the average “modern” human being to believe that the existence of a woman as “just” a wife and mother is illegitimate. This is now ingrained very deeply in us. Even many of the women who do stay behind to guard the hearth and home, often fret about proving they are “doing enough” at home in order to justify their presence as homemakers."
"We, as 21st century families and mothers, have been lulled to sleep by feminists theories that whisper from us from the magazines and books on the racks that falsely dictate what home and family life for us should be like and what our 'rights' are."
The irony is astounding. The Cult of Domesticity purports purity and laments the depravity of what they deem whorish behavior, all the while dehumanizing women giving them a twisted sexual power over men. The Cult of Domesticity takes women to a level of being subhuman, a place where they can not choose to live fulfilling lives as their God-given individuality sees fit. The Cult of Domesticity has reduced women to a be a mere asset to men, and in turn has also disabled the individuality of the man. Rather than man and woman being two separate, individual entities who exercise their own efficacy, they have come to this sick dependance on each other, with women being the base root of evil. It leaves man crippled and unaccountable when it is always proclaimed that woman is the cause of his failure, and it's unfair to constantly blame the woman, citing what the cult calls man's moral decline to be the fault of woman. Man can look after himself, and woman shouldn't be expected to be responsible for the sins of man. They've created double standards, and worst it is all done in the name of God.
As for my own view of the roles of men and women in society, I think both Oscar Wilde and Ralph Waldo Emerson got it right.
"There are moments when one has to choose between living one's own life, fully, entirely, completely - or dragging out some false, shallow, degrading existence that the world in its hypocrisy demands."
"To be yourself in a world that is constantly trying to make you something else is the greatest accomplishment.”
But then again, perhaps the film Jurassic Park sums up what is surely foreboding in the future with this quote:
Ian Malcolm: God creates dinosaurs. God destroys dinosaurs. God creates man. Man destroys God. Man creates dinosaurs.
Ellie Sattler: Dinosaurs eat man … woman inherits the earth. ; )
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